Small Talk: Go from surviving to thriving

Check out the HEFE rapport-building techniques (Hobbies, Entertainment, Food, Environment)!

Imagine this. You walk up to the convention center. You open the door and see a big room with many people chatting like old friends – it is likely that they are. 

You make your way toward a small cluster of friendly-looking industry members with a big smile on your face and realize that you now need to make small talk.

I did some research to help you dust off your small talk skills. 

Here is what I found:

• The old rapport-building technique of FORD (Family, Occupation, Recreation, Dreams) is out because it can be too personal and awkward to use
• Instead, use HEFE (Hobbies, Entertainment, Food, Environment) because it is more engaging and fun.

Think about it, everyone has hobbies, craves entertainment, has to eat food, and exists in some environment. 

Here are some examples of each.

1. Hobbies
   • Any exciting plans for the winter?
2. Entertainment
   • Have you seen/read [Insert Show/Movie/Book]?
3. Food
   • Where’s the best place for [Insert type of food]?
4. Environment
   • What do you think about this venue?
   • Have you seen the [Insert thing] yet?
   • Which speaker are you looking most forward to?

If you want to stick to the FORD rapport builder, I suggest sticking to occupation questions. 

For example:

• What brings you here?
• How long have you been a [Insert occupation]?
• Do you know anyone else here?

Remember, not everyone is perfect or social butterflies. Just be yourself, and if you can’t think of any questions to ask, just actively listen. People appreciate being heard. 

Pro-tip: Exhibitors will always be friendly to you, so warm up with them first :)